The troubled genius' magical invention.

Claim to fame: Inventor of a motorized bar stool who was charged with DUI when he crashed the stool after consuming 15 beers. The stool is capable of going 38 mph, and it is made with the motor of a lawnmower.

Cause for concern: We at WNT feel this genius is being wrongfully judged. His motorized invention could be the solution to many of our world’s economic and environmental problems- it saves money, gas and the lives of innocent people who could become the victim of drunk driving accidents involving cars.

Kile Wygle is just another troubled genius being labeled by our society as a drunkard, a simple man, a fool, if you will. We feel his genius is being ignored for the laughs of many. In the spirit of Galileo, we think Wygle should be freed of his charges and given the help he needs to cure him of his alcoholism.

WNT Diagnosis: Misunderstood genius, alcoholism

Treatment: Alcoholics Anonymous, an invitation to join Mensa and a government grant to build more fuel-efficient yet cost-effective vehicles.

Posted in People Who Need Therapy Tagged: alcoholics, Kile Wygle, therapy ]]> http://whoneedstherapy.wordpress.com/2009/03/31/people-who-need-therapy-kile-wygle/feed/ 1 whoneedstherapy ODD Bar Stool DUI http://whoneedstherapy.wordpress.com/2009/03/31/why-gen-y-is-dumb-and-broke/ http://whoneedstherapy.wordpress.com/2009/03/31/why-gen-y-is-dumb-and-broke/#comments Tue, 31 Mar 2009 15:00:00 +0000 whoneedstherapy http://whoneedstherapy.wordpress.com/?p=383 ]]>

The new "I'm with stupid?" (picture: zazzle.co.uk)

I feel better after reading this article from MSN Money because it turns out that I’m not alone when it comes to being broke and dumb–the truth is, many people in my generation are. It’s nice to have company.

Our generation faces not only a new “financial landscape” but also has a lack of financial literacy, which is why most of us have an average debt of about $8,200.  The article also mentions our tendency to buy the latest iPhone whether we can afford it or not. Although my Samsung and I scoff at such an idea. At least I was smart enough to spend my non-existent money on rent, so there.

photo: Toshiba.com

For those of you who want to go beyond recycling yet cannot afford a Prius, click here to download handy calendar of tips for a greener lifestyle from Sparkpeople.com.  The calendar includes some easy tips such as collecting rainwater to water plants and eating seasonal foods, which also adds some green to your wallet.

Yes, this does make me want to eat. A lot.

And this is why I, as a former fat kid, advise against putting pictures of Gisele on the fridge as motivation. Although looking up to models might motivate you to throw away that box of cookies, it can also create extreme behaviors that lead to “binge dieting and the kind of unhealthy eating habits that ultimately result in weight gain, not loss, ” according to this article from Newsweek. And not to mention hunger imagining the starvation that some of these models might be experiencing.

Although we all know that “as American women have gotten heavier, models have gotten thinner and taller,” I had no idea that not only ded models 25 years ago weigh only “8 percent less” than the average woman, but models ten years ago averaged at around 5 feet 5 inches in height.

Well, that explains the new Top Model, which I’m surprised health experts haven’t commented on as much as they could-I mean, wouldn’t promoting a show for “short” models just lead to an even higher number of young women starving themselves? It seems healthier knowing that being a model is impossible based on height alone, though that Cover Girl contract does look tasty..I mean, um..okay, I’m going to lunch now.

"Women hate Maxim" was not included.

This list of things an editor of Maxim has learned about women includes the obvious ones such as wanting a clear apology and not an explanation and also that women dress up “for their girlfriends” and not men. However, this one was a big surprise:

“6. Women are vulnerable to the curveball. Compliment a hot woman on being hot and a man will run smack into her defenses, no matter how creative he is (and we can get very creative; this is Prime Directive stuff). But compliment a smart woman on being hot, or a funny woman on being smart, and unless he is a total dorkasaurus about it the man will double his odds at least, as his target correctly recognizes him as unusually perceptive, sensitive, brilliant, etc…”

Luckily for me, I don’t fall for compliments too easily. The last time I was at a club and a guy informed me that my glasses turned him on despite the tape on the side thanks to my latest mosh pit debacle, I limped away immediately.

Soak for 5-8 minutes, depending on severity. Warning: Please wait until roommate leaves apartment before attempting.

Wait…don’t. According to scientists in Germany, people who focus on getting even have less life satisfaction, fewer jobs and even fewer friends. I bet these scientists have never had a roommate who convinced the landlord to overcharge them for rent. Because if they did, they would know that using said roommate’s toothbrush to scrub the toilet is actually very satisfying, and who wants to be friends with him?

But anyway, getting even, according to this article from Psych Central, is a reflection of a focus on “negative reciprocity,” and it is separate from “positive reciprocity” like when you buy a friend a drink for helping you move. These two are independent, and you can have one more than the other, which can possibly negatively affect your life.

This is your kitchen on detox.

Put the forty bucks for organic maple syrup back in your wallet. Dr. Patricia Fitzgerald from the Huffington Post gives a sensible approach to detox. While it’s true that we are exposed to more toxins than before, sustaining on cranberry juice for a week and a half might not be the best way to rid yourself of toxins, which your body is already doing for you all the time anyway. It’s boring, but the best approach is just to eat healthy on a regular basis (ie, ask for more tomatoes in your fresco burrito at Taco Bell).

Where are they now? In this economy, probably on the same couch.

Are your parents sick of your couch potato ways, asking you why you aren’t using your education or at least applying for a job at Starbucks? Are you sick of trying to explain why your life plan has changed every six months to no avail? I have just the comeback argument for you: the Odyssey years.

In this classic piece from David Brooks of the New York Times, there are about 6 phases of life these days: “childhood, adolescence, odyssey, adulthood, active retirement and old age.”

So basically, that time you spent your savings to live in New York City jobless, or the fact that your next goal is to save up for a trip to Bali to find yourself, or even your latest six-month job search are all part of the “Odyssey” years, which is kind of like your second adolescence. You know, the one that began after graduation when your biggest ambition was to work for Urban Outfitters. So tell your parents, your family, your nerdelicious in grad school that you’re just on an odyssey, dammit, and that maybe they missed out on some crucial development by rushing into things, or at least some fun. But don’t harp too much-you might need their couches sometime soon.

With the right attitude, you too could one day sustain on a dollar per day. Kind of like the kids in Africa!

NeverSayDiet.com has an actual shopping list for spending only about a dollar day for about three weeks’ worth of groceries. The list works best if you’re a pescatarian who’s really into tuna and if you also don’t like vegetables. But if you add those two, it could be about 2 to 3 bucks a day, so it’s worth a try-the lentil soup and omelette look pretty yummy.

OOH! I'll take the screwdriver!

Yahoo! Green provided a list of places to get free stuff today, and it included the free section of Craigslist and also Freecycle in Yahoo! Groups. Although these things are definitely worth a try, they usually work better in bigger cities. In LA I got a free TV, which was much nicer than the one I had before, and also a free scale.  The city was full of rich people dying to give stuff away. This is in contrast to Freecycle Dallas, where I almost got a TV once again (apartment fire, long story), but a really old one, and the email ended with “I hope things turn out okay for you.”

This made me feel a bit silly. I mean, I’m just a broke twenty-something, not a homeless runaway looking to find a something to sit on that will fit into my cardboard box. Point being, make sure you put aside your pride because people in smaller cities might not understand “recycling” as much as they do “bum,” and on that note, do not borrow your mother’s nice car to pick up the T.V.-that might confuse/anger people.